I think it has finally hit me. I know I say it all of the time but my babies are truly growing up and it really hit me this afternoon. This morning was their first day of going to preschool. I attended with them and it was more of a Meet the Teacher, See the Classrom, kind of day but they don’t know the difference so we treated it as the BIG first day. It was an exciting morning. They are more than ready to go and I am ready to have them grow, learn new things and make new friends. And, I’ll be honest, I’m SO excited to have a couple hours twice a week to go to the gym, grocery shop, clean, read, etc. (my list goes far beyond what I can really accomplish in 4 hours a week but I’m cramming in as much as I can!) I’ve joked that I need to find a preschool to take them on the other days so I can really do everything I want.
The morning was perfect. They had a ball and I think they will really thrive at preschool. But after we came home and I put them down for a nap, I started looking through all of the pictures and I realized… I’m not sure I am really ready for this. Then a few minutes later someone posted this on Facebook next to a picture of a mom and her child:
You will never have this day with your children again.
Tomorrow, they’ll be a little older than they were today.
This day is a gift.
Breathe and notice.
Smell and touch them;
Study their faces and little feet and pay attention.
Relish the charms of the present.
Enjoy today, mama.
It will be over before you know it.
– jen hatmaker
And I held back tears. I know the time is flying by in a blink of an eye. I’ll enjoy my few hours a week alone, but man, I want to appreciate the time, this time more. My boys are sweet, funny, crazeee, loud, rambunctious and A LOT of work but it’s work I love and I need to remember that daily. I want to slow down and cherish it all. I want to be calm in midst of screaming kids who are jumping off couches or who are fighting over the same toy. I want to be patient through bedtime routines that are taking longer than they should because someone wants another book, a drink of water, their favorite monkey that is in the car or another trip to the bathroom. I want lower my voice although there is crushed cereal and chocolate milk spilled all over my newly shampooed carpet. I want to slow down so they can stop to pick up a bug or climb into the car and buckle themselves (or to at least give them time to try). These are little nuisances and someday I will be wishing that my little guys were stripping the couches of their cushions for 5th time today to create a landing pad.
I swear Ricky has matured 10 fold in the 3 days that he has been a first grader. And these little guys, well…. look at them:
Yep. Proof that I should probably stop referring to them as babies.
(I truly thought “those” people were crazy when they called their grown kids “babies” but I get it now)
New School Shoes.
New backpacks – (picked out by big brother, Ricky and totally fitting of their personalities and interests.)
Finally at school.
We were a bit early and Benny was SO anxious to get inside.
Once inside, the boys were so excited to check everything out. Including hanging up their backpacks.
Building with blocks.
Tying, buckling and buttoning.
And even flushing the “little baby” toilets. They both took turns practicing flushing.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I won’t enjoy those hours of “me” time immensely but I’m taking my emotions on this day as a reminder to myself to enjoy the little things more. To get more joy out of the mundane like flushing the toilet multiple times Just kidding. I actually think this will probably be a good balance, I’ll get time for myself and be a better mommy during the time that I am with them. Four hours a week will probably work wonders.
We’ll see how I do next week when I have to leave them at school without me, but I think it’s going to be great all the way around.
But ….don’t be surprised when, before you know it, I post the high school version of this picture and wonder where the time has gone.
PS – This also means, if you haven’t gathered already, that we are potty trained! Woo Hoo!